Tired of striving, struggling and pushing so hard for results? Try Attracting Instead!
Being irresistibly attractive is about living a life that feels really good to you. When you feel attractive to yourself and set up conditions in your life that work best for you, you’ll become more attractive to the world. This means, you don’t attract those things you hope or wish for; you attract the people, experiences and opportunities that match how you’re being, how you’re living and how you’re showing up in the world.
1. Feel Good First
It’s a mistake to think your life has to be problem free before you can feel happy and peaceful. The opposite is actually true. First you work toward joy and serenity and then your life challenges lessen. Most say, “When I reach my goals, I will be joyful.” But you must be joyful first. You must start with the determination that you will settle for nothing less than feeling good. And when you first seek joy, all else that is good follows. This is because joy is very attractive.
2. Be Attractive to Yourself
While it always feels good to put your best face forward, being attractive is not just a matter of physical appearance. So rather than spend a lot of energy trying to look good to the outside world, or play a part to gain the approval of others, focus on what makes YOU feel good instead. Ask yourself, “Is this the life I really want?” Or “Am I being the person I came here to be?” If not, are you willing to make a change for the better? The person living the life they really want attracts others who are doing the same.
3. Stop Chasing and Start Being
Most of us chase after things and few of us naturally attract the good stuff that we truly desire until we start living the life that feels most appealing to us, and until we start being more like the things we want to attract. In other words, if you want happier people and experiences to come around, be genuinely happy. If you want to experience more kindness from others, be kind first. Be the friend that you would like to have. Be light, laugh easily, be confident, and be yourself. Let your true self be revealed. When you begin to live more authentically, you become simply magnetic.
4. Create Beautiful Spaces around You
When you come home, do you feel a good vibe in the air? Your home is your sanctuary and you deserve for it to feel that way. Even if you’ve gotten used to a chaotic environment, you’ll feel a lot lighter when the space in your home is beautiful and functional. And lightness attracts more light. This doesn’t mean you have to blow your budget or go overboard with remodels. Simply focus on the little things that make a big difference. If you’re overwhelmed and don’t know where to start, design at least one area in your home to feel like yours entirely.
5. Put Peace and Quiet at the Top of Your List
Is it becoming harder remember what you did just a few days, or minutes, ago? Are you always in a rush, becoming clumsier or running into furniture? If so, your mind is in need of rest. Because life gets busy and hectic, it’s essential to find those moments of calm. Take time for yourself. Take time for your life. Without rest and rejuvenation, you cannot be fully present to enjoy the unfolding of your life. Slow down your pace and make peace and quiet a priority so you can remain grounded. A centered you is a more powerful you, and others will be drawn to you when they feel such presence.
6. Nurture Yourself
Women are nurturers and we’ll put our own needs aside to take care of the needs of others. We have genuine concern for the wellbeing of humanity. And yet, how well can you nurture those you love when you’re exhausted and totally spent? Honor yourself and care for yourself first. When you nurture yourself without guilt, you’ll feel better. And when you feel better, you’ll have more positive energy. This feeling creates and attracts better experiences. When was the last time you felt really nurtured? Re-create that experience in your life once again.
7. Make Room for Your Desires
If you’re feeling overstretched and overcommitted, perhaps it’s time to say the dreaded n-word, NO! And it’s okay. Learn to say YES to the things you want to, and NO to the things that you need to. Radical self-care means taking an honest look at your life and letting go of the things that no longer serve you. This helps you create a landing pad for your heart’s desires. How can they come into an already jam-packed life, otherwise? As you start removing what you don’t want, you’ll make room for the new things that you really do want instead.
8. Allow Yourself to Receive
Some people think, “Why is it taking so long for my dreams to come true?” If you’ve ever had this same thought, it isn’t because you don’t deserve them. It isn’t because you don’t want them badly enough or aren’t working hard enough. Maybe bits and pieces of the dream have been coming to you but you keep saying, “No. I don’t deserve that” Or, “I can’t have that.” So many wonderful things are waiting to come into your life. Are you letting them or are you pushing them away? So much of what you’ve asked for is already lined up outside your door. Allow yourself to open up and receive them.
9. See Yourself in a New Light
If you had friends who talked to you in the same negative way that you sometimes talk to yourself, would you continue to hang around with them? If not, why do you continue to talk to yourself that way? People who like themselves are automatically attractive to other people. So maybe it’s time to re-think some of the assumptions that you carry around about yourself. Are you really such a bad person? If you want to attract more loving and supportive people, speak to yourself with loving kindness. Be shameless about who you are. Don’t shrink back; don’t hide yourself from the world. See yourself in a new light and let that light shine.
10. Affirm the Positive
My friend Rachelle has two favorite sayings, “My life is good and it’s only getting better,” and “Today is the best day of my life!” And she’s serious about both. It’s really fun to be around Rachelle because she radiates this ‘best life’ point of view. Go ahead, say it out loud, “This is the best day of my life!” and mean it. See how great it feels? This simple act will raise your perception to a whole new level. From this vantage point, you’ll begin to notice all the positive things around you and even if nothing earth-shattering happens, you’ll be in a better mood. This positive mood is very attractive.
11. Make Gratitude a Habit
When you catch yourself feeling kind of low, a simple way to switch your focus is to ask yourself “What am I grateful for?” When you hold feelings of gratitude for the good you already have, you instantly create the space for more good to come. You see, the glass is both half empty and half full. How you choose to relate to the glass makes all the difference. Be grateful for what you already have, and you will being to notice, attract and experience more good in your life.